a purpose

When I was an adolescent, I was incredibly angry. I purposely fought back against my parents, I denied the existence of a god and wrote a darker brand of poetry than I typically do today. I wrote a poem entitled 'Conflict of Self Interest'. It spoke to how I felt there was something inherently wrong with me, something awry. I felt for one reason or another that I would search for my own happiness all my life and never be able to quite find it.

Thankfully I have learned many things since then. I have grown to appreciate my parents for the wonderful people they are. For now, I have accepted the fact there is a divine architect behind all of what we see yet I contemplate his level of intervention. I enjoy writing poetry that sometimes tears at a heart yet sometimes elevates the next. However, I still recognize that internal conflict but have now grown to appreciate it because it defines me. I believe it to be the one great gift I was given.

I have always been open minded but have never dealt well with conformity. Some may accept something in its most raw form and then whittle it down while understanding it. I am the opposite. I will poke, prod, question, doubt, set ablaze and then completely tear down something to a finer material before digesting it.

Somewhere within that style of acceptance, I draw comparisons to what I already know. Thus was born my love for metaphors.
Somewhere in the blueprints for that process is the prerequisite to appreciate beauty. Thus was born my source for inspiration.
Somewhere in the fold of a thought is an imperfection to find and recognize. Thus was born my admiration for uniqueness.

Mixing all of this together endows me with an ability to capture a thought. I can hunt down a moment in time, encapsulate it in words, pin it down on a paper canvass with systematically placed verbiage and then stand back and appreciate it with poetic diction in its purest form.

My last blog became an outlet to burn a demon. It allowed me to vent anger, frustration and depression. I am not sure what this blog will become by my guess is that, much like my last one, this will evolve into what I need it to be. I hope you will join me.